Justin Locke Productions

Dr. Demento says:

"In 'Real Men Don't Rehearse,' Justin Locke dishes the dirt about classical music. While you're laughing out loud about the things that symphony musicians write on their sheet music, what they consume backstage, and other previously secret knowledge, you'll also learn a lot about what makes music magical. Highly recommended!

Peter Schickele says:

"'Real Men Don't Rehearse' paints a lively picture of what goes on behind the scenes at a major symphony orchestra. Anybody who thinks that all classical musicians are stuffy and lack a sense of humor will be set straight by this rambunctious book."

Buy direct from the publisher! Just $14.95 plus $3.49* shipping -- best price on the net!

*Flat rate for any size order in USA. Ordering process will display int'l rates.

REAL MEN DON'T REHEARSE is the funniest book you'll ever read about orchestras and classical music! This is what it's really like to play in a professional orchestra. Unlike the usual high-minded approach, this is a laugh-out-loud look at the culture of the certifiably insane people who play notes for a living.

To order by check, click here for order form.

"You're guaranteed to find yourself laughing out loud while reading
"Real Men Don't Rehearse."

–-Strings Magazine

Read Excerpts | Read Reviews! | Contact | Bookstore


Real Men Don't Rehearse was written by Justin Locke, who spent 18 years as a professional bass player, playing with the Boston Pops and the Boston Symphony. Justin is also the author of Principles of Applied Stupidity. To buy both books (and combine shipping), please visit our Online Bookstore! Also check out Justin's speaking appearances!

Complete Info is listed below on how to purchase the book with your credit card, as well as with Paypal or by check.

"If your idea of a great ab workout is laughing until your stomach hurts,
this book may save you hundreds of dollars in gym membership fees."

--International Society of Bassists Magazine

This is the best deal on the net ($14.95 plus s+h), as you are buying direct from the author/publisher with no middlemen. Also you can get a great deal on combined shipping if you are buying multiple copies, or if you are buying both "Real Men Don't Rehearse" and "Principles of Applied Stupidity." Your order will ship within 24 hours (often same day), via first class or priority mail. Autographs on request!

And don't miss the infamous 60-second video promo!

For more info, questions, etc.: send an email to justinlocke@juno.com or call 781 577 0169.



Not sold in stores! To order your copy of Real Men Don't Rehearse:

Books are just $14.95 (plus shipping, and tax for Massachusetts orders). This is the best deal on the net! Clicking the box at left will take you to a paypal credit card payment page. Note, you do not need a paypal account, just click on "continue" down by the pictures of credit cards. You will see shipping costs listed before you buy (they are also listed below on this page). "Standard" shipping is first class mail so fyi, priority is not that much faster, and orders of 2 or more books ship priority anyway. Note, we always send out a confirmation e mail within 24 hrs of receipt of orders. Click Here for a brief tutorial on how to order internationally.

Download pay-by-check order form


Clicking on this red box will take you to a convenient ORDER FORM that you can print and mail in with your check. It does all the math for you!

(scroll down for more info . . .)


Real Men Don't Rehearse is $14.95 plus shipping (3.49 for first class mail, 6.99 for priority), plus .93 sales tax for orders in Masachusetts. Personalized autographs on request! Int'l shipping starts at $9. Canadian customers shipping starts at $5.

We love it if you buy it direct, but you can also buy the book in the Greater Boston area at these fine independent retail establishments: Backpages Books in Waltham, MA; Johnson Strings in Newton MA; Spectrum Music in Lexington MA; and Foxes Music in VA.

Please, if you have any questions, want your copies autographed, etc, feel free to e-mail me. my email address: justinlocke@juno.com

Read Amazon Reviews! (But buy it here!)

Justin Locke Productions
1 Randall Street #4
Waltham, MA 02453

To purchase using Paypal: click on the blue box above, or send a paypal payment of $18.44 ($14.95 + $3.49 shipping -- Massachusetts residents, please add .93 sales tax, for a total of 19.37) to my paypal email address: justinlocke@juno.com

You can also use this price chart to calculate your order! Very useful for orders of multiple copies!

Welcome international visitors!

We are pleased to have been featured in The International Musician, American Harp Journal, OSU Podcasts, Int'l Trumpet Guild Journal, Tuba and Euphonium Journal, Jason Heath's Bass Blog, Classical Music Magazine and The International Society of Bassists Magazine! To order from all countries, just use the paypal buttons on this page, your shipping is calculated automatically. Questions, special shipping requirements, really large orders, etc., Please email me! (justinlocke@juno.com)

Note, I can't take international checks, even if made out in US dollars, as bank fees here are very high for them.

If this seems complicated or if you need help or have questions, please me! my e mail: justinlocke@juno.com or call 781 577 0169.

Read Excerpts | Read Reviews!


Also by Justin Locke: Principles of Applied Stupidity is a most unusual look at how you can use things normally thought of as "stupid" to attain surprisingly positive results. Buy both books in our online bookstore. Check out excerpts and videos.


Phone: 781-577-0169
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